Thinking Like a Goddess by Kristina Steffens

Welcome dear Goddess.

So wonderful to have you as my reader!

I am delighted to welcome you here, to share my words about learning how to think like a Goddess. 

Because: in every woman there is a strong and holy Goddess and all women should remember this fact.

So, I am here to ignite that little flame of remembrance, to guide you into this wonderful part of you.

What I will show is a short introduction plus five easy and magical steps to access that power for you:

  • To gain more clarity in your chaos of thoughts
  • To develop a way of thinking that makes you proud of yourself and especially kinder to yourself
  • To stop you from self criticising yourself 

Just to be a strong, self-loving woman – like a Goddess.

So, let’s start…


To develop a way of thinking like a Goddess in your mind is an interesting and important topic for me these days.

Let me ask you a few questions…

  • Do you sometimes realize that you thoughts are way too many for you?
  • Do you fight with an endless stream of recurring thoughts that never stop – and which make an unbearable reality that is catapulting you from living in the now?
  • Do you have dark and critical voices that give you unpleasant feelings about yourself?

Well, then you are like me – or many other women in this world.

And then this text will show you a way to improve you own way of thinking. It shows you a way to gain control and to have a mind that is calm and peaceful.

For you – and for this world.

Some theory first…

Our modern world is full with media, all of our lives are pretty fast. A lot of people make their money online – alone based on their words. That is neither good nor bad, but is showing us one important thing: words are powerful – and energy like solid products and can make a reality (or a living).

And thoughts in our mind, as the pre-form of words, can do this as well.

All this stream of informations and our lives with smartphones can really fill up our heads. Without our own doing, life is full of words!

When I was young, all of this media didn’t really exist, but I was already overwhelmed by my own thinking – and sometimes I still am.

My mind talks and talks and talks… you get what I am saying.

I think, creative people or Buddhist monks have a good way of releasing „the cloud of thoughts“. But what if you forgot how to do it or if you think that you are not an artist or a spiritual person at all anymore?

Did you know, by the ways, that we as women have a direct way and connection to creativity and spirituality through our cycle? Listen inside of you – does this resonate in a way?

And then the brain. Isn’t it anything else than an organ that is constantly absorbing and resonating waves of energy?

And with this, I would like to get back to my words earlier: Thoughts and words are energy, and all energy follows the direction we give it.

So if you have dark thoughts that are constantly streaming your mind, then your live could look like this:

  • If you are afraid of failing – you might definitely fail in some way.
  • If you think talking to people is difficult – it will be difficult.
  • If you find life a hardship – your life might probably show you many difficulties.
  • If you feel alone – then all people seem to be away from you, only concentrating on their own lives.

On the contrary, this law of attraction can also show up in positive ways:

  • If you think that today you look really pretty – people may come and give you compliments
  • If you get up in the morning feeling excited about a good day to come – the day will be lovely
  • If you are lucky about your current live – more luck will show up

So, it seems as a pretty logical decision what we would like to invite in, right?

Please acknowledge four important things here:

  • You are the creator of your live and you hold the power
  • Feelings are feelings are feelings… they are ok and they make you human
  • Words and thoughts are powerful
  • Happiness and satisfaction can be learned
  • Having a stream of thoughts is pretty usual for all of us

What I exactly mean by this and what you can practically do to gain more thought control and invite the light in your life, I am going to show you in a minute.

Before the next steps, I would like you to know:

  • It is okay, to have every occuring feeling.
  • It is okay, when you get sad.
  • It is okay, when you get angry.
  • It is also okay to be happy
  • It is okay, to feel all of these feelings.

I am emphasizing this here and now, because I would like to show that gaining control of our thoughts doesn’t mean that we suppress our feelings.

No, what this is about is that we learn, that thoughts can make us feel something and that constant thinking may intensify this. Let’s not say, it makes us suffer.

It really is important to see the power of our thoughts. They are like a mirror.

So, let's start with step 1: Your Stream of Thoughts

The first important task to gain control of your mind – like a real Goddess – is to become conscious of your own pattern of thoughts.

If you already are an expert in this, please see this as an extra training in which may find some new facets of yourself.

Anyway, please find a comfortable, quiet place where you can be alone for some minutes.

Make yourself comfortable. It doesn’t matter if you sit or lay down.

Close your eyes.

Follow your breathe with your consciousness for some moments. 

Please do not change anything about it, because we also do not wish to change your stream of thoughts. This might be important for some meditations, but not here.

Listen inside yourself: what do you think? Which topic runs through your mind? Are you fully with me or does your brain talk what it wants?

Dive deeper…

  • Do you use any type of control?
  • Are you excited?
  • Do you observe yourself?
  • Do you ask yourself how you should be?
  • What you should think?
  • What expectations are on you?
  • … anything else?

Probably, a stream of thoughts has started in your head, without forcing anything. Right?

That is your stream of thoughts. Unstopped and like it always is.

Is that you? Do you identify yourself with it?

Breathe again consciously for some time. Follow the way of your breathing. Stay with its rhythms. Are the thoughts coming back? If yes, greet them – and go back to your breathing. Back and forth. Do this for some minutes.

Listen inside. How does this feel? Who is talking in your mind? Is there something behind?

Please do this exercise repeatedly over the few next days. I would like you to get some consciousness for your own way of thinking. It is the base for the next steps to come. Like children, repetition makes the habit – or the expert. On your way to become a Goddess, it is the most important step.

Because I would like you to make you see three things:

  • The identification with the thoughts makes the really unpleasant feelings in us
  • We have an observer in us and are not our thoughts
  • Underneath all of this is silence and our wonderful consciousness that feels marvellous and is our connection to Source

It can be felt with some exercising. It gets developed with every repetition.

Because that is what we need: to gain clarity and control to become stronger and more powerful.

This is a good moment to give some insights from my personal experience…

First of all, what has really helped me with becoming the Goddess in my mind: every one of us has this never ending stream of thoughts.

But on the other hand, I faced some difficulties, because I just didn’t understand some terms spiritual leaders and teachers used. I was confused. And these insights I would like to share.

I just did not understand the terms “silence of mind, observer, never-ending consciousness” etc. etc. 

So what happened is this:

  • I mentally forced myself to stop the thoughts
  • I tried to force mentally the feelings I should feel – with my thinking
  • I judged everything repeatedly
  • I thought I shouldn’t have any thoughts at all

All wrong.

These were products of my never stopping mind – again.

It is important to realize your own way of thinking. But to develop new thoughts how it should be – is part of it. Any difficulties or any resistance – is again part of your thoughts.

Can you see yourself in this? Good!

Therefore, please do this small exercise regularly, because the fine nuances to your point of silence need constant and soft repetition. Take everything as it is.

Step 2: Breathe – The Voice of Life

An every day breathing habit is an important asset for situations, when the recurring thoughts make you feel:

  • Restless
  • To critical about yourself
  • Worrying too much about just everything

…when you are just feeling uncomfortable with all the chattiness in your mind!

This form of technique I have developed for myself on the basis of my yoga classes.

The most important thing is that exhaling takes longer than inhaling.

In Yoga, it is said, that the slowlier and longer the breathing is, the longer we live! And inhaling is for uplifting energy and exhaling for relaxing.

It is one of the main tools to influence our thoughts and our being.

Long exhaling stimulates the parasympathical system which helps us to become calmer and much more relaxed. Short inhaling lifts us up, when we need energy.

Please make yourself comfortable. Close your exhale. Breathe in and out, following it with your consciousness. Inhale and exhale deeply from your belly three or four times.

With the next inhale, count till 4.

On 5 and 6 stay calm.

Then exhale, counting from 7 till 12.

Wait, until the natural impulse to inhale.

The pattern should look like this:

Inhale 1 2 3 4 – wait 5 6 – exhale 7 8 9 10 11 12 – wait…

Do this technique for a few minutes.

As you realize, you can do this whenever you want, whereever you are. Do it in the following week as often as you like. And realize, how you imply a new habit to get instant relaxation through your breathe.

It is also interesting to realize the own breathing pattern. A lot of women breathe way to short and don’t know about this. Are you breathless sometimes?

I am using this technique many times during my busy days. When I need to become more relaxed, for example in the evening with my kid. Or when I am upset, because someone has been rude to me…

There are moments when it is difficult to relax. My restlessness just does not want to release me from its grip. Sometimes, I am stopping then. And sometimes, I am calmly going on with slow breathing. 

Counting is also a good way to keep your mind busy – because you control lightly, what you think. It might be advantageous to trace this feeling. Because there is nothing more powerful than to realize: the power lies in my own hands! And a Goddess has the power in her hands.

Nevertheless, even here it is important: be kind with yourself.

There is no price to win, no right way to do it, all this may be done with ease and without pressure. On the long run, there is more to win with lightness.

My whole breathing has deepened immensely and I am much more connected with myself. Try this and you may feel the same!

There is another technique I would like to introduce – I call it “silence of breathe”.

Sit down and close your eyes. Deepen your breathing into your belly. Do this three or four times.

With your next inhaling, you say the syllable “si…” and with your next exhaling, “lence…”.

Other words you may use:

  • Relax
  • Loving
  • Let go
  • Peaceful
  • With me
  • At home
  • Just be

Or any other words that sound right in your ears in this moment.

The breathe is the direct connection to source, mother earth and the life itself. Giving him more of your attention and consciousness is extremely healthy. Conscious breathing brings you home and closer to yourself.

It is a powerful tool that is with you in every minute. It is happening without your doing – what a gift. What a miracle. Let’s use it.

And with using this tool, you can also influence your thoughts – which is our goal to become more like a strong, powerful woman. Like a Goddess.

Because: in every woman, there is a Goddess.

So let’s go to step 3…

Step 3: The Pride of a Goddess

If you think of a Goddess – what does she look like? She stands up straight, with her head high. She looks you directly in the eye… right?

So, another important way to think like a Goddess is to think more profoundly of your body and how you position yourself. It is also having a strong impact on yourself, inside and outside. 

Here is a little exercise to realize and exercise it.

Take a few minutes every day in the following week or so. Find a powerful place for you.

Close your eyes and take some deep breathes to arrive in your body and get centred in yourself.

Follow your consciousness to your feet. Feel how you stand on them. Balance slowly on them from left to right and from toe to heel – each movement for three or four times.

Do this again, but now move around in a circle. Do you feel more grounded now? 

Imagine now that you are growing roots deeply connected into mother earth. They hold you and give you strength. Let them grow deeper and deeper – as big as strong as you desire.

Follow with your consciousness from your toes all the length of your legs up to your womb area. Move your hips softly from left to right and back and forth. If you like, move your hips in circles for a few times. Stand still and listen inside of your womb area, feel the energy moving and swirling around.  Then tilt the pelvis slightly forward.

Follow your attention from the pelvis area upwards to your shoulders. Pull them up, circle them slightly around and let them drop softly.

Then straighten your head. Lower your chin a bit, but really only a bit. Imagine a string coming from your crown chakra (the highest point at your head) pulling you slightly upwards. Feel how your whole body is also straightening.

Your gaze aims clearly and openly in the distance.

If you like, imagine yourself wearing a beautiful, sparkling crown on your head. Feel the dignity and the pleasant pride that is developing from this posture.

Dive deeper into this attitude, into this position, embrace how queen-like you are feeling right now. Let this feeling flow from head to toe.

  • Your are deeply rooted.
  • You stand straight.
  • You feel the pride.
  • You are beautiful, beloved Goddess.
  • You are the Goddess of your life.

Practise this position throughout the day again and again. Perhaps you are facing a difficult situation – why don’t you use it then? Experience your Goddess dignity with all of your body.

All is already inside of you.

Perhaps it might feel new and unfamiliar in the beginning. That is totally okay. Nevertheless, try it again and again. What’s important here is to realize a new way of feeling your body.

Deep inside of us, there is a strong, universal power that is innate from the day we are born. We all are a divine spark from the universe. 

As children, we live and feel this strongly and unfiltered. Then, often it is forgotten and neglected throughout our stories of growing up. That is pretty human.

But know this: this spark is there. It only needs to be ingnited by you through soft practice.

This small, but fine exercise is a wonderful tool for you in your toolbox. Use it and feel the magic of living the beauty and power you are.

Step 4: The Inner Stop Sign

If you have come this far with me, I would like to introduce a bit of a control thing.

So far, we have used soft techniques to influence our thinking. I am not emphasizing the next step in the beginning, as it might seem to be too mentally.

Forcing the mind to become still may disconnected us from ourself and our feelings, so this should be used extremly consciously.

But do I stop my thoughts from running around deliberately and on purpose?

Definitely: yes!

I just don’t have the desire anymore to follow every annoying thought in my mind. A never ending blah of worries, fears and criticism for myself is so tiring. And I can imagine that you might feel the same.

So… if you have practised the exercise in step 1, then there is another small, but powerful routine for you.

As soon as you are having a thought that you know well and don’t wish to follow again and again, then just say to yourself:

Stop. I do not wish to think this thought now.

You can use stop or any other word that suits you. And you also may give an appreciative comment like “thank you for coming up and trying to give me insights again, but now I wish to kinder of myself…”.

I am using this technique, when I am realizing thoughts arising that do not lead to anything in that moment.

For example:

  • Critical comments
  • Everyday worries
  • Fears
  • Unreal anxieties

There is a bit of a caution needed here. From my own experience, a trap for blocking out too much may be found in this – like I said. But when we realize we start to ponder, it is a precious tool to use.

Why should we fill our mind with “trashy thoughts” that are constantly making us suffer or that are stealing energy?

Well, total nonsense! If there is something we can do about it, we should do it.

A small example: let’s say, you have a part on your body that you still haven’t accepted with all of your kindness and love. When I was younger, it was the way my hairs where looking in my ponytail. When they didn’t lay properly flat, then I put hours and hours of my attention to this thought. I thought it was ugly. My thoughts went back and forth… today I think: stop. I don’t need this. I like myself – and my hair – as it is. I love myself.

Important to know here: mastery comes with practise. Patience and a bit of discipline is needed, but it will become easier and easier not to follow every little thought into pondering.

I am excited to know how this applies to you! I hope and I know for sure:

  • You are a Goddess with power over your thoughts.
  • Because it is your brain – and your life.
  • You are allowed to decide to be soft and kind to yourself.
  • You are allowed to feel comfortable.
  • You deserve to find yourself wonderful.
  • You are allowed to love yourself totally and with all of your heart.

Step 5: It is All Up to You…

In step 3, I wrote about patience and discipline… Especially the latter does not sound pretty charming, or?

I have to disagree strongly in this.

I am pretty impatient innately, but I know from experience that patience – positively applied – makes the life I am living more pleasant. Softer, calmer and more in rhythm with nearly everything.

The same goes to discipline. Who doesn’t like the word may replace it with “regular practice”. We all know that babies are doing everything they can to learn to walk – with all their might. 

We as humans are normally like this. So my recommended exercises may bring you more and more wonderful experiences. Do not expect big changes from the beginning – like I did. Or do not forget that there are moments that don’t feel perfect. 

That is okay. That makes you human.

And maybe only one practice sings to you – that is also okay. Even only one new thing in your consciousness may change your life.

This is my gift to you.

On your way to think like a Goddess: practise, practise, practise – to unbury all the treasures inside of you that are hiding underneath all the pondering, self-criticism and the everyday life.

Because: you are a Goddess.

And now it is up… to you.

With all my love.

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Kristina Steffens is a Wise woman and Spiritual Doula at

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